I'm torn between being with you and being without you.
If I permit that my life will be spent away from you, I know for sure that it would be empty and melancholic, on the other hand your life will grow and you'll be able to expand the things that you already know.
It's very clear to me that your absence will be temporary and I will be able to see you whenever I wanted to.
But the distance scares me. You know what I've been through. Sometimes you blame my past for leaving a scar on my heart. For making me traumatize. But I have given you my all my trust, for you thought me how to trust a person again. Please don't get mad if I get stubborn and paranoid. Please understand my inexcusable fears. For I. Cannot. Afford. To. Lose. You. Not now, not ever.
Missing you will be mandatory for I will have no other choice but to feel it and the thought of you feeling the same, somehow gives me fulfillment. That you will long for me. Too. The situation makes me desperate. Do we really have to be apart? The simple things of just being with you with every chance that I get makes me contented. It fills my heart with happiness.
You know how important you are to me.. I tell it to you everyday. You know how my life literally changed right in the very minute that you walked into it. I was, deeply wounded and scarred when you came, but you made me feel that I shouldn't be treated like a trash. That I am special and I deserve the best. You melt my fears and you are the sole reason behind my smiles
I wanted to thank you for the simple things that you do. For cheering me up whenever my lips starts pouting. For doing the craziest things. Thank you for thinking of me everyday. For making me feel that I'm already a part of not just your present but your future as well. Thank you for making me feel beautiful. Thank you for the I love You's everyday. Thank you for all the best things that you've done and still does for me. Thank you for considering my welfare on every decision that you'll make. Thank you for always asking my opinion. Thank you for not taking me for granted. Again, no words are enough to tell you how grateful I am.
I love you. And I'll tell it to you everyday. And now that you're in a situation that you needed to make a decision, not just for yourself but for the both of us and our future as well, I want you to know that yes, I would love to be with you every single day of my life for you are the love of my existence but I am willing to sacrifice. I am willing to take the risk. I'm giving you all my trust. I'll lay it on the line. Whatever you're decision will be, I will just be here. Praying for you. Thinking of you. Supporting and loving you.I admit, I'm so scared of not being with you, but I trust you and I will respect your decision, whatever it will be because I know it'll be the best for US. I love you.
|Because YOU mean the world to me.|